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A Fresh Start

A Fresh Start

So, I pretty much suck.

I know it’s been forever since I posted, and I’ve been completely neglecting everyone else’s blogs — I’ve been following along with you guys, just not commenting much, promise! But, I hope you all will forgive me because the good news is that I am FINALLY and COMPLETELY 100 percent moved in to my new place of residence.

As I mentioned in one of my recent posts (a thousand years ago) I have been in the process of taking a giant leap forward in my life and moving in with Todd. It has been a long, long, LOOOOONG process. I had more crap jammed into my teeny, tiny little apartment than I can even begin to describe here. And after weeks of sorting and boxing and transporting and cleaning, I am sorry to say that there are STILL boxes everywhere.

BUT, I did turn in my keys and am officially living in my new home. So I’m adding this move to the “win” column and hope that in the next week (or two…) that I’ll be able to sort through the hot mess that is my life and finally move forward.

I was planning to return here and post some deep, thought-provoking words about how much my life has changed and how this move — in SO many ways — represents a new beginning for me. But I’ll spare you guys the boredom and simply admit that these past couple of weeks have been…well, hard.

In all of my excitement to move forward in our relationship, I think I sort of forgot how difficult it might be to abandon my apartment and literally (and figuratively) close a door to my past. I had to swallow my fears and move to a place that is not the “home” I’ve known for the past 28 years of my life.

I relocated just a stone’s throw away from my parents’ house when I first moved out — it’s the town where the majority of my piano students are based. Mind you, I’m only 30 minutes south, and I’m still commuting up there several times a week to teach, but it has been an adjustment. It’s all still very new to me. (Although I do have to say, I’m greatly enjoying the fact that I live closer to the Jersey Shore now). :)
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The good thing is that “new” doesn’t seem to frighten me as much as it once did. I am so incredibly grateful and excited for this fresh start in my life. So many wonderful, amazing, unbelievable things have happened to me in this past year, and none of them would have been possible if I didn’t have the courage to do things that were new and scary and might make me just a little bit uncomfortable.

If I didn’t get past my concerns about on-line dating — or, you know, the fact that I hadn’t been on a “date” since I was 16 years old! — I never would have met Todd. If I didn’t stop thinking of myself as the “fat” girl I used to be, I never would have signed up, trained for, and completed my first marathon…or my second, for that matter! If I didn’t stop believing that I wasn’t worthy of happiness, I wouldn’t have found the courage to end my previous relationship and face the terrifying prospect of living — and being — completely on my own.

I know it sounds kind of cheese-tastic to say, but in a lot of ways, conquering the Dopey Challenge earlier this year helped me uncover a strength and a courage and tenacity I never knew I had. I did something I never in a million years thought I could do, and now, major life events like changing residences just don’t seem quite as terrifying. If I can transform myself from an obese couch potato to a freakin’ marathon runner, then what the hell CAN’T I do? Right? :)

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So, in conclusion, I am happy. REALLY happy. And I’m SO relieved to be settling in and getting back to business and gearing up for another round of marathon training for the New York City Marathon!

How has achieving running-related goals affected you in your “real” life?

Comments

  1. I love your outlook! I personally never liked change but I have learned that just because something changes doesn’t make it bad. Sometimes a lot of good comes from change and it only enhances your life! When I started running I was pretty upset about a certain situation in my life. Since I have accomplished so much in my running career it has made me feel better about other aspects of my life.
    Good luck getting everything unpacked and organized. I can’t wait to see pictures!
    P.S That swim suit is super cute!

    • Jennifer says:

      Aw, thank you! I’ll definitely be sharing a picture or two as we get everything together (read: when I get my crap out of boxes)…especially of our new medal display area, haha. ;)

      That is SO true. It can definitely be scary and unnerving, but sometimes a big change can be the absolute best thing. Totally convinced of that now. :)

  2. Way a great way to look at everything! Change is never easy, even if its going to result in a positive outcome. I’m sure this only the beginning of a series of great and positive changes to come your way! :)

  3. Awe. You look so happy and I can feel the happiness radiate off the computer! Way to go. I know how hard moving can be, especially when it is something that requires a lot of self-reflection. I am happy for you and can’t wait to hear more!

    • Jennifer says:

      Aw, thanks, Amy! Definitely feel that way. :) Oh yeah, that’s for sure — there was all kinds of self-reflection going on these past couple weeks…believe me!

  4. Welcome back! I’m loving all the positive changes. I think that running a marathon really broke through a mental barrier for me somehow. It just seemed so unachievable, yet I did it!

    • Jennifer says:

      Thanks, Stacie! That’s exactly how I feel. Once you do something that seems so ridiculously impossible, then other “life” stuff just doesn’t seem quite as daunting.

  5. Congrats!! I was so happy to read the “Cheese” and courage both. <3

  6. You are awesome! Congrats on making the move and good luck with all the unpacking!

    I love that picture of you from Dopey – it is possible the best race picture I have ever seen!!

    • Jennifer says:

      Thanks, Kristina! :) I’m going to need it…haha.

      I was pleasantly surprised that I actually liked some of my in-race photos. It’s definitely one of my favorite race pictures of all time. :)

  7. This is so great! I’m so glad about your outlook and the strength you realized you have! It’s funny how finishing a race (or 4 of them in a row) can change your life like that!

    Congratulations on all the good things you have going on and I hope they continue to get better! :)

    • Jennifer says:

      YES! Exactly. That’s why it’s so hard to explain to non-runners that it’s never “just” a race, right? :) Thanks, Kellie!

  8. “Change is good.” “Yeah but it’s not easy.” I’m also scared of change but it can also be fun. It sounds like such a wonderful time for you. Good luck unpacking. I always found unpacking easier than packing, but I always put off packing in the first place.

    • Jennifer says:

      SO true. I’d say unpacking is easier, for sure, but I’m doing a bit of procrastinating, not gonna lie… ;)

  9. I am so excited for all these wonderful changes going on for you!! I hope unpacking isn’t too stressful over next few weeks!

    Running has absolutely changed my life for the better. Not only has it given me so much confidence, which has improved my daily attitude and relationships around me, but it has changed my career path for the better too!

    • Jennifer says:

      Thanks, Lauren! I hope so, too. Can’t wait for this to be over and done with already, haha.

      That is SO true — I feel the exact same way!

  10. Running totally changed my life. I’m super intimidated and excited to run goofy in 2015. Training with an infant won’t be easy, but it’s so worth it!

  11. It’s not cheese-tastic at all! Congrats on the move, so happy that you’re happy and another great season of training lies ahead for you!

  12. I agree with you (WITHOUT A DOUBT) that accomplishing a huge running goal is something that can give you the confidence to undertake just about any other challenge with a mindset of success. :) Good for you!

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